THE OLD COAT OF SADNESS
I’m back - again.
It has been over a year since my husband began his journey through surgery camp. He has had 6 surgeries since Sept., 2018, each with a long recovery time. He is recovering from the last one that took place in September. And he drove for the first time last week. Amen. I feel I am getting my life back as well as he is.
And in my months of care giving I have learned many lessons about “through thick and thin”. Some times I wonder how we did this without too much trauma to our hearts and souls. Here is what I have decided. It’s a choice. Not the physical aspects. He has no choice about the surgeries. WE have choices how we handle it.
Everyone has a story about something they are handling. And how they deal with the challenges. I met a young mother at my grandson’s soccer game. Her husband is in the hospital battling leukemia. My friend is on hospice ending her years battle with breast cancer. People are waking north of us with their house on fire. Sons are on drugs. Couples are divorcing. We all have a story. And it is called life.
I now think of the feeling going along with the challenges like an old, worn but warm coat. There are days when I want to just sit and wrap myself in feelings of sadness, fear, anger, impatience. Add your own words here. I want to sit and be cuddled in sorrow. And I have done that - for a bit - then I realize I can and do throw off the old coat for and get back to living my new life. I visualize the sun shining, the day lovely and me energized to get up and get going. I chose to get going. I could choose to stay cuddled in my anger or frustration. It is a choice I make.
Look around you. All the people sipping their Starbucks with their eyes on a phone and ears plugged full of white ear bobs are making a choice. Old men chatting over donuts at the coffee shop each morning at 7 are making a choice. Running by the beach at O’dark 30 is a choice. Looking at the fall colors on the trees and feeling wonder is a choice. Sound so Hallmark but I know it to be true. And I am sure your life story is filled with choices too. Each morning we start anew with an opportunity to make new choices and take time to consider where and how we want to be in this 24 hours.
I realize if I want to leave a mark about my existence here I want it to be positive. I want a legacy that says “she threw off the old coat of sorrow and burst out the door of life in living color spreading compassion and love”. It costs nothing. And at the end of the day, I can recognize how blessed I am to live where there is great medical care, the scenery is stunning, the services are close, my family is near.
What is it that you cuddle in when times are hard? And no saying they are never hard!
We are alive and life can be a challenge.
What is it you do to kick start living again?
What are your 4 most amazing blessing?
What will your legacy be?
Please reply - anyone reading this - and let me and our Gifter friends know your story.
We can all use some new ideas!
Happy Fall - a time to pick ourselves up and begin again.