I HEARD ABOUT IT - BUT NOT FROM YOU!
"EULA! Look at this. Right here. It's Miss Victoria. She's dead"
Eula looks up from her ironing. "When that happen? It was in the church blletin" Linda Mae poked the newspaper with her finger, "I know. Says here the funeral was yesterday. Yesterday! Can you believe it? And they didn't even have the manners to tell us. Just wait until I call Julia. I bet they didn't tell her either! Some people just don't have any bringing-up!"
from Death for Beginners by Karen Jones
That is what happens when we don't prepare.
Your manners get scolded. Or, another way to look at it, your friends are sad they could not say a loving good bye.
I read this as a reminder I have the ability to write my own death announcement or obituary, making sure it says what I want people to think about. If I am having a dance of life, let them know so they can come dance. If I am having no service let my friends know I have died so they can gather with each other and tell stories.
If I want a published obituary make sure it includes the attributes about me I want remembered, successes I value, people I love.
Take the time to think about how you want the world to remember you. If writing your own obituary is too challenging, jot notes down and put them in The Last Gift Box so your family can have an outline to go by.
If not you could have an obituary that never gets written or one you would never approve of. Consider this one:
"Authorities say that the brother (of the deceased)...who was killed...last month, got into an argument with his father over an obituary written for the funeral. According to the grandfather, the brother's name was left out"
Obituary, Baltimore, Maryland